Having One Of THOSE Days???

Like everyone else, I have days, or in this case months, where I am not feeling 100%. I am not pleased with how I am dealing with certain things, or I am not giving myself the care that I know I deserve.
As someone who has spent the vast majority of the past 9 yrs deeply involved in the Nutrition Industry, I find that people often assume that I am perfect, and lead by example 100% of the time. They often think that I will be critiquing what they eat, how they lead their lives, exercise, what supplements they take etc. It is as if every statement I make is an all-encompassing judgement on them.
The truth is that I am human, and just like everyone out there, I MESS UP. I get stressed, I stress eat, I am not always 100% "on", I don't always go 150% on my workouts, I eat junk, I struggle with my weight, and yes- I have "fat days".

I often feel worse, because people believe I SHOULD have all the answers. I don't. It is frustrating that I fall prey to the same human behaviours many make when I KNOW BETTER- but the thing is, I'm human. The difference is that I am aware of it; so keenly aware of it, that it sometimes feels as though it is a value judgement on my self worth.

Then I get over it. How? By NOT making a big deal of it. I find the more time and emotion I put into berating myself and thinking about NOT repeating the behaviour, the more it becomes a focus; the more it is on my mind, and the more I engage in the very behaviour that I am trying to avoid.

I have been under a considerable amount of stress recently, and I do not expect it to get much easier any time soon. So I have to accept this and deal with it unless I plan on being miserable for the next 9 months. This is NOT okay by me. Being healthy means MENTALLY, Emotionally, as well as physically.

We need to be healthy in all areas, as they are all interrelated. You can't expect to be happy all the time, but you also can't expect to be happy if you are treating yourself poorly all the time.

Today I propose taking a breather. I have written numerous times about taking a 'geographic' (physical change of environment/geography) be it just going for a walk around your neighborhood, to the grocery store, to the book store, or as is the case for me today: to the mall. Yes I should be focused, researching and working. But I need a distraction first and foremost from the stress that is permitting me from focusing in the first place. I need a distraction from myself, from the stress and the 'you should' voices in my head. And if window shopping achieves that, then so be it. Walking through Chapters, by THE BODY SHOP (their Satsuma Body Butter will uplift your spirit no matter what!), sipping tea @ Starbucks (CALM Tazo tea- very appropriate), listening to the music, trying on ridiculously expensive eye creams and taking advantage of great tester face creams; perusing boutiques and wandering around is exactly what my soul needed today.

 A break to unwind. Permission to DO NOTHING, instead of trying to do everything, and yet getting nothing done. Allowing yourself to procrastinate every once in a while is restorative, and will renew your energy and enthusiasm for life- revive your vigor and hopefully renew your spirit. Renew your belief in yourself that YOU CAN DO IT: you can conquer any challenge that comes your way.  That you will deal with it with dignity, integrity, self-respect, and in a manner which serves to strengthen your inner belief... and in the mean time, if you happen to catch a great sale or buy a little treat for dessert... it won't hurt either ;)

Liberte Greek Yogurt, Sweetener and cinnamon added, with a crumbled Chocolite Cookies and Cream Bite and another Yogurt with the To.Die.For Peanut Butter Patty... highly recommend it. I inhaled 1/2 of the tub before I snapped a picture with my phone. If you see Liberte in stores, I highly recommend giving them a try. I am in the midst of doing a product review, (products do differ from Canada to the States), and am thrilled they don't use any hormones, chemicals, growth regulators ( rBGH free ) etc.

If you haven't tried CHOCOLITE Products.... go get some NOW!

How do you cope with stress? What stresses you out the most and what events/circumstances cause the most unease? What are your triggers? Do you have a pattern of things (deadlines, certain events, people, fear of not living up, fear of success/failure) that cause you to feel less than "100%" and fall prey to certain behaviors? How does this affect and effect you?
What has allowed you to "move on" and stop these thoughts/behaviours and turn things around?
What are some of your best "distractions" and ways to get your mind off of things?

I would like to add that if you are really feeling low, and are having a hard time coping PLEASE seek some help and talk to someone.

Healthy Habits; Taking yourself out of the situation.

Janetha posted an interesting post on Healthy Habits, which really got me thinking. I think a problem with many of us is NOT dealing with emotions. Or rather, dealing with them in unhealthy ways. In keeping with the 'Healthy Habits' theme, I wanted to introduce another 'healthy' habit that many of us could benefit from. Getting out of the negative situation!

Learning how to remove yourself from the situation that is causing you to cope in unhealthy ways is one of the first steps in realizing that you are worth it. Many people struggle with emotional eating, guilt, fear, anxiety, self worth and feel pressured to put on the 'all is well' front. I think it's necessary for us to realize that it is okay-  more than that: HEALTHY, for us to be able to recognize and feel that we are not okay at all times. Whether it is feeling the pressure to look a certain way, suppress emotions, appear put together and perfect, successful, or buy that perfect present; all of us succumb to pressure at times. Being able to put distance between us and the emotion is a great way to gain perspective. I call it 'Getting out of the eye of the storm'. REMOVE yourself physically from the situation.
This is one of the best ways to EMOTIONALLY and psychologically remove yourself from it as well.

I recently was feeling so stressed out, and the entire fridge lay temptation to being consumed within an hour. It is often hard to think 'How will I feel after this' when you are just trying to numb the emotions/fear/feelings down and get through your day. Rather than giving in, I recognized that I needed to get out.It is hard to stop, so rather than mentally exhaust myself trying to rationalize with myself, I grabbed my laptop, note book and headed to my favorite Starbucks. Getting out among people really helps get you out of your head. Listening to the Holiday Music (Josh Groban), listening to the laughter and conversations of people around me, and seeing all the people around me really helped.

Now I realize that it is seldom this easy. But having a 'back-up plan' and listening to your intuition, recognizing that something is off and you are not coping is one of the best habits we can develop. I think that too many of us have developed or started working on this habit too late in life.

Here are some ideas:
1. GET OUT OF YOUR APARTMENT/HOUSE/CONDO/desk etc.
Even if it is for 5-10 minutes, get away. Go for a quick walk, go window shop, or just sit somewhere safe until you can gain perspective and calm down a bit. You need to think straight and when you are riled up, this is no state to be making decisions in.

-When you are feeling a bit better, allow yourself to feel whatever it is you are feeling. Pain and hurt, as unpleasant as they are, are a healthy and integral part of our psyche.
-Take deep breaths!
- Distract yourself. I like walking through Chapter's or book stores, Home & Bath stores, grocery isles... anything with a lot of stuff to distract me with. Ironically, this lets me think clearer!
- Have a back up plan. If you are going through a rough time, brain-storm a few ideas ahead of time that you can do if you ever feel yourself getting overwhelmed. Join  a Yoga class, buy some paints, pick a favorite walking path, or head to your favorite grocery store (there are no right or wrong places-as long as they are safe!).
While this time of year is hard for so many people, the festive spirit and music/lights make it a wonderful place to reminisce, reflect, think and getaway without feeling too isolated and lonely.

I think so many of us put too much emphasis on trying to align ourselves with how we think we SHOULD be, vs how we really feel. This 'dis-alignment' causes so much grief.

Obviously, having someone you can talk to is essential to our well being. It's a hard step to make. We may not always be successful in extracting ourselves from toxic situations; the pain may be too great at times, and we may feel too tired. But those rare occasions that we are able to get out, and forgo the emotional binging, or whatever behaviour it is we end up regretting, it is the most empowering, and joyous feeling.

And for those times that you don't, and you do eat everything in your kitchen, cupboards, pantry, freezer etc, remember: IT'S OKAY!!! We all make mistakes, and we all go through times where our actions leave us feeling depressed, frustrated and regretful.

Just remember, that one day does not define you. Nor does one week, one month, or one year. Each day is a chance to make a fresh start, take a little better care of ourselves, learn to be in-touch with our feelings, and learn better ways to cope. Forgiveness of self and self-love are one of the healthiest habits I know.