Rant

So after I posted last night, did my fitday, printed it out etc I went down for MORE Superfoods brownie batter. It was so chocolaty and thick... and I was so stressed out. Total Jan 1 intake? 170g! 684cal and 21.25servings!!!

I am now contemplating what to do today. I am going to the gym (opens @ 9)...and then..I don't know. I had plans with S to do our regular Saturday groceries etc, but he is causing so much anxiety for me. He is being an immature loser. Won't text when I don't spend the day with him. Didn't text Happy New Years because he was too jealous I was with other people- and now he doesn't text unless I contact him first. It's all his manipulative way to make me come to him. He keeps repeating the same few sentences over and over (VERBATIM) "It's all about you" "you know I would do anything for you", "I have all the time in the world for you" and then of course, reminding me of everything he bought me (using it as a control technique):
"I bought you that bowl didn't I"- when he full well knows he did. He always reiterates. Or out of nowhere, completely unrelated he says "So...now you're good on crackers/tuna/canned beans etc because I bought you a case". Not just once, but over and over and over...
"I can't keep track of what I bought you- it's cost me over $3000", or "With the amount of books I'm buying you and probably will be, the savings card will save me money in the long run (on updating me Irewards Chapters/Indigo membership card- I never asked him to).
BAH
Sorry for the rant. I need to make a decision soon- before he wants to have a lovely discussion about "US". He is good at texting his feelings, and of course blurting them out when he drops me off and goes running through the back door to his car and yells in out loud 2 sec from when the door closes. So LAME. Ugh

I know I sound like a MAJOR bitch right now, but I am so frustrated. I truly am a nice person, and I go out of my way to be nice to him because he is insecure etc. I have tried to ignore comments, as not to embarrass him and make him uncomfortable (ie his immature behaviour, comments via text of how GREAT we'd be together etc), and I truly am a nice person. But I am FED UP/Exhausted and annoyed beyond words!

I will update my day later....
sorry for the RANT!

Jan 1 2010

I woke up this morning (slept in) at 10am!! I stayed up late researching which gyms were open near me- only one and it was far away. I went to see it the Rec Room gym was open, but they forgot to unlock it. I then contemplated jogging outside, but upon realizing it was -24C outside, I changed my mind. I did some bicep curls (60 each arm) and 10 push ups and called it a day! ha ha. I then ate a pack of radishes dipped into Walden Farms Italian Dressing, and made 37g or Amazing Grass SuperFoods Chocolate! LOVE THIS! I got this yesterday at Planet Organic. 37g= 4.62 servings. I naturally added 2 packets SweetnLow, Davinci Sugar Free Peanut Butter syrup, Walden Farms Pancake syrup and cinnamon!







I then spent an hour researching the Internet for some supplements etc, and decided to go lie down at noon. I NEVER do this, but this was a challenge. I get antsy and my heart rate will actually speed up. I had some BIJA Holy Basil tea- which works miracles, and totally calmed me down. I normally use New Chapter's Holy Basil, but the tea was a nice adjunct. I promised myself that I will stay in bed until 1pm. I decided to continue with my reading of Edward Kennedy's Memoir 'True Compass' (fantastic) and finally got up to go to the bathroom. My sister and I had tentative plans to go see a movie, but I hadn't heard from her by 1:22pm- still sleeping. I turned the kettle on for more tea and then turned to the computer only to see the 'missed call' alert on my cell. I had literally JUST missed her call. She obviously was too tired! I talked to my dad a bit (so impersonal and formal with me- brought tears to my eyes), and am now drinking 2 more Holy Basil teas, listening to music on my computer, and just killing time!

I made some raw zucchini marinara and ate another bag of radishes:



I then made my GG Scandinavian Bran Crispbread of goodness along with more Chocolate Amazing Grass Super Food Chocolate batter:




I then made dinner using a bag of broccoli slaw, tuna, 4 cans of beans, 908g bag romaine, tomato, green onion, dressing, 12 nori sushi seaweed sheets:





I let stress get to me and ended up getting 2 more cans of green beans, 74g of broccoli slaw, 11.8g zucchini with lemon pepper, and some with sweetener and cinnamon, 3 more sushi sheets.... and then I ran down to my storage mail box and had another 37g chocolate superfood, went back up decided I want more, and made TWO more trips to get more! In total? 139GRAMS!! 518cals worth! I am texting some friends to see if they want to hang out tomorrow so I don't have to see S (anxious already) but they are either busy catching up on work, have plans etc. I feel like such a failure. Tomorrow my gym finally opens back up from Dec25 so that will be nice. I am a basket case!

Happy New Years!

Today started off with a great workout, then dread as to what I should do with my day. I ended up getting picked up by S. He brought up the subject of 'US' again via TEXT. He is such a pathetic coward. He said he wants to talk about it in the New Year before it DAMAGES us. I told him it's his call and he already damaged it. Our grocery run went fine. We ended up @ Planet Organic where I got AMAZING GRASS SUPER FOODS in CHOCOLATE! 5 spices, Simply Natural Black Bean/Corn Salsa, another Planet Organic reusable bag and a drink! Here is a picture of my goods- and yes, that is an Atkinson's sugar free Chik'o'stick on the left side resting on top of the spice!!!

I immediately made my Chocolate Brownie Batter with my GG Scandinavian Bran Crispbread!

And FINALLY a picture of my syruped, microwaved, cinnamoned, sweetened PGX'd bowl of pancake syrup, crumbled bran crispbread goodness!! I had 1.5 entire packets! YUM

Here is dinner:

I am eating the rest of my crisp bread, drinking tea, and about to watch Josh Groban!

Wednesday part DEUX!

My workout today was good again- but I was so tired I couldn't really push myself. My legs felt energized and strong, but the rest of me was DEAD. I did my normal 54min and burned 522cal/5.48 miles. I stayed at work up til 5pm and then stopped by Starbucks to sample their NEW TEA. This tea DOES NOT COME OUT UNTIL JAN 12 but I'm friends with all the staff so they immediately made me one. It is ORANGE BLOSSOM and it is in the loose leaf teabags (like Mighty Leaf teas). They discontinued the TAZO Wild Sweet Orange, so this is replacing it. The bags look so nice!

Because I haven't been posting as much, I keep forgetting to update on all the NEW products and things I've gotten! I have gotten 14 new bowls! One is a 7QT glass bowl, then I got a Luminarc 6QT glass bowl, 2 anchor 4QT bowls, and a bunch of 'soup' sized bowls in different glazes etc. I also go 6 mixing bowls!

I am eating my GG Scandinavian Bran Crispbread with sf pancake syrup (Sorbee's)and Walden Farm's Pancake Syrup, Davinci sf syrups (assorted flavors), sweetnlow, cinnamon, and PGX granules. Microwaved and topped with a bit of WF Calorie Free Chocolate Dip (with sweetener and cinnamon mixed in). I'm about to make dinner.

Thought I would include this picture of the BEAUTIFUL snowflake shaped ball that hangs between my work and the connecting mall.


These are cell phone pictures taken through the glass in Starbucks. They DO NOT do it justice. It is so much brighter and more beautiful.

WEDNESDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I tried to get to bed early, but am so exhausted from these past few months that I couldn't wake up. I was in that foggy exhausted daze. It is 706am now... running late for the gym.
I am trying out a new thermo this morning: The NEW formula of Xenedrine Xtreme FX. I really liked the one they had 3 weeks ago... and then they changed it up and I don't like the formulation as much anymore. I am going to test it out and see.

I miss the original Cytolean from Gaspari. I have been leaving my phone on vibrate or silent 'preventatively' so I don't have to deal with S. I have got to figure this out. Work was DEAD yesterday and I made so little money $18... That is more stress. But other than that, I am happy. Very blessed and grateful for what I have!!

I packed a bag (340g) of broccoli slaw, a can of green whole beans, 2 bags of radishes (455g each)and some WF dressing packets I had laying around. I will update later.

Hope in Tuesday

I ended up getting out of bed @ 11:47pm to go eat something. I wish I had more of my GG Scandinavian Bran Crispbread with me. I needed something dry. I ended having 2 large zucchinis peeled and seasoned with cinnamon, and Sweet'n Low and microwaved for 4 minutes. The other 1/2 I just loaded with my new seasoning: Johnny's Lemon Pepper! Also microwaved. I also ate a yellow bell pepper. Needless to say I got less than 5hrs of sleep. I feel so out of it lately. Planning on going to Coles/Chapters after work. Headed to the gym now, then work, where I am working with my FAVORITE co-worker! I love this girl!!! I also need to see if the mall I'm near has a calendar club this year. They are doing MAJOR renovations, so 80% is shut down. I have a slight calendar obsession.
I want to see NINE and Imaginarium of Dr Parnassus. I have seen Sherlock Holmes, It's Complicated, Avatar etc. There are matinees playing downtown due to holidays (other theatres are always open during the day, just the 4 downtown aren't-evenings only and weekends, unless it's summer holidays and winter break).

UPDATE: felt so nauseated this morning. Workout was okay. work was frustrating. Deciding whether or not to text "S" was even more stressful.

I am probably going to see Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus with my friend Patrick tomorrow.... unless he has to work again (lawyer) or sue someone...

I am stuffed, tired, cranky, and STRESSED! My hair has been falling out ridiculously. I literally SHED. I also took sheers to my hair this morning and lopped off an inch or so. I always wear it up in a pony tail, so I don't really care if it's uneven. At least the split ends are kind of gone...
Good night!

Best Zucchini Slice Chips EVER

You can make these into 'chips' or make them spicy using cayenne, cajun seasoning, pepper, roast chicken seasoning or ANY spices you have:

Sweet Zucchini Slices/Chips:
1.Peel as many zucchini's as you want.
2.Cut into slices
3.Toss in a mixture of cinnamon (or pumpkin pie spice) and sweetener (stevia, splenda, sugar, sweet and low, sugar twin etc)
4. Microwave (or broil/bake) until you get your desired 'texture' (more for chips, less for soft)
5.ENJOY serve with sf Pancake syrup or jam!

This is the WORST picture ever. Sorry! I love microwaving burning broccoli, cauliflower and my FAVORITE thing to make is ASPARAGUS CHIPS! I will post my favorite recipe I created for my Spinach Pumpkin Dip later!