Anxiety..

Why am I waking up so late?!??! I can't go to sleep, always get up to go eat at like 11pm and wake up so down and tired. However, THE WEATHER IS GORGEOUS! SUNNY AND BRIGHT! I totally panicked, got paralyzed and called in sick to work today. I need money-seriously, but I just FREEZE and then cancel work. I feel smothered, overwhelmed and I just need to BREATHE and think. My weekend friend is smothering me and it's too much! I want to go look for storage containers today, and I texted to ask if he wanted to come.  If he had replied normally, I would be fine. He always says something like " The earlier the better, I am just stoked to see you and be around you'. (I know that SEEMS nice, but it's putting so much pressure on me, and he does it to manipulate). I all of a sudden felt like I couldn't breathe and texted back 'I'm going to go check the store right next to the gym first to see if they have any there instead'. He always says these lame things like 'my only purpose is making you happy- i will do everything I can possibly'. STOP IT!


Gym: 60min on the elliptical, which is a lot, but I took it easy.

Wanted to show you guys my 'surplus' of sample supplements. I have this x 3 and then 3 full shelves of FULL sized (not sample packets) bottles and my freezer is FULL of Greens, probiotics etc. MY gym locker is THE WORST. Below are 2 of my containers (those are my newstorage containers!)and I have one more and 3 FULL huge bags packed full of more samples of supplements etc:

I had more of my shake/icecream and 4Fiber pudding yesterday, and thought I would share pictures:

The second picture has the shake on top (hence the spoon in the bowl and duel colors).

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I resigned my lease which made me feel semi productive, and put money on next months' rent. I also had a minor breakdown (release) in my apartment office. Bottling up so much isn't healthy. Let's just say that my pay check was 56% lower than normal- and I am barely getting by on 'normal' and I have to buy groceries for 2 weeks with it, rent, bills etc.

On an unrelated note (kinda- it deals with Project DeClutter/Organize) I get a 'word of the day' from a radio station, which I then enter and get point for. Today's word? CLUTTER!

Very apprapo! It's a SIGN!! Must clean and get organizers/more storage containers!

Thought I'd share this song that's catchy: